We live in a screen-obsessed world where being an authentic self can be a little risky. We are just trying to be accepted and liked by the society we live in. The images we provide on our social media depicts who we want to be instead of reflecting who we truly are.
So the question here is how do we take this mask off and start living the life of authenticity? First, we need to understand what being authentic means. It means that you act in a way that shows your true self and feelings. Instead of just showing a particular side of yours to people you show them the real genuine you.
Overcoming inauthenticity feels hard because we were brought up in a way by our parents, teachers, and society which taught us to fit in so instead of being authentic selves we became adaptive selves. To reclaim our authenticity we need to discover our authentic selves. We need to know who we really are. Here are seven ways which help you to be authentic to yourself:
Observing yourself
Observe yourself objectively the way you observe a fly on the wall. Observe yourself, how you react under pressure, how it takes challenges, or what he believes. Then ask yourself are these emotions authentic? Do you really felt that way? Identify which response was authentic and which was adaptive. By identifying the difference you will begin to notice the falseness and dig the truthiness.
Dialogue between Adaptive and Authentic Self
Have a discussion between your Adaptive and Authentic self. It can be done by practicing meditation or any other thought exercise. Ask yourself a question mentally and see how both responses differ from each other. Listen patiently and try comprehending these responses.
Try understanding both sides for instance our adaptive self may focus on not being hurt due to something that happened in our past and our authentic self is afraid of rejection. In this exercise try figuring out the reasons behind such responses as it will help you understand why you act the way you do so you can decide whether you want to act differently or not.
Practicing Self-love
One of the most important steps towards being an authentic self is loving yourself and accepting your true self. Set aside some time for yourself every day, take deep breaths and feel relaxed. Appreciate yourself and stop being too hard on yourself.
Courage to face your fears
Develop courage so you can face your fears. Our authentic self might have fears, anger, and sadness. It can be possible that when our authentic self was hurt as when our adaptive-self took over. We need to have the courage to explore ourselves and to know what we are hiding deep inside not only from the world but from ourselves.
We courageously need to explore the truth and the reason which made us the way we are today. Accepting and letting go of such fears and getting rid of our buried emotions is what brings us close to our authentic self.
Ask yourself what you truly believe
Ask yourself what you truly believe in, what are your beliefs about yourself. One of the best ways to do this by writing it down. Ask a question and write your belief down it can be anything like nobody loves me, I am ugly, I am fat, or I am not good enough.
Now next step is to identify the reason which developed such belief, who gave it to you, and why you are still holding on to it. The next step is to create positive alternatives to such negative beliefs such as no I am good enough and then see do these beliefs represent the authentic you.
Identifying Discrepancies
Identify the discrepancy between your actions and your beliefs. If you make a sexist, racist, or any other hurtful remark ask yourself is that what you really believe or is it just because someone else taught this to you. If you acknowledge what is actually true for you then you can live a life in which you can be authentic to yourself.
Letting go of beliefs and patterns that do not serve you
When you come across an emotion that you feel is just not you try letting it go. According to researches visualization is a good tool for it. Imagine the belief or emotion in a bubble and let it rise until it disappears. You can also write it on a paper and then cross it, crumble the paper and just throw it away.
Read more: 5 ways to stand up for yourself
We need to recognize the fact that developing authenticity takes time. The process of examining ourselves is a lifelong process as we are always evolving as human beings so it takes time to know the real you. It takes time to release the beliefs and behaviors that we believe no longer serve us but it does not mean that we can’t do it. With some effort, we can find ourselves aligned with our true selves.
Another important thing is to maintain our authenticity and we can do that by simply practicing some habits in our daily life such as the habit of speaking the truth, making decisions and statements consciously, and continuously monitoring ourselves. If you want to progress you need a growth mindset which helps you learn from past experiences and a willingness to strive to improve oneself. This may sound like a long journey but trust me it is worth it!
Read More:
We live in a screen-obsessed world where being an authentic self can be a little risky. We are just trying to be accepted and liked by the society we live in. The images we provide on our social media depicts who we want to be instead of reflecting who we truly are.
So the question here is how do we take this mask off and start living the life of authenticity? First, we need to understand what being authentic means. It means that you act in a way that shows your true self and feelings. Instead of just showing a particular side of yours to people you show them the real genuine you.
Overcoming inauthenticity feels hard because we were brought up in a way by our parents, teachers, and society which taught us to fit in so instead of being authentic selves we became adaptive selves. To reclaim our authenticity we need to discover our authentic selves. We need to know who we really are. Here are seven ways which help you to be authentic to yourself:
Observing yourself
Observe yourself objectively the way you observe a fly on the wall. Observe yourself, how you react under pressure, how it takes challenges, or what he believes. Then ask yourself are these emotions authentic? Do you really felt that way? Identify which response was authentic and which was adaptive. By identifying the difference you will begin to notice the falseness and dig the truthiness.
Dialogue between Adaptive and Authentic Self
Have a discussion between your Adaptive and Authentic self. It can be done by practicing meditation or any other thought exercise. Ask yourself a question mentally and see how both responses differ from each other. Listen patiently and try comprehending these responses.
Try understanding both sides for instance our adaptive self may focus on not being hurt due to something that happened in our past and our authentic self is afraid of rejection. In this exercise try figuring out the reasons behind such responses as it will help you understand why you act the way you do so you can decide whether you want to act differently or not.
Practicing Self-love
One of the most important steps towards being an authentic self is loving yourself and accepting your true self. Set aside some time for yourself every day, take deep breaths and feel relaxed. Appreciate yourself and stop being too hard on yourself.
Courage to face your fears
Develop courage so you can face your fears. Our authentic self might have fears, anger, and sadness. It can be possible that when our authentic self was hurt as when our adaptive-self took over. We need to have the courage to explore ourselves and to know what we are hiding deep inside not only from the world but from ourselves.
We courageously need to explore the truth and the reason which made us the way we are today. Accepting and letting go of such fears and getting rid of our buried emotions is what brings us close to our authentic self.
Ask yourself what you truly believe
Ask yourself what you truly believe in, what are your beliefs about yourself. One of the best ways to do this by writing it down. Ask a question and write your belief down it can be anything like nobody loves me, I am ugly, I am fat, or I am not good enough.
Now next step is to identify the reason which developed such belief, who gave it to you, and why you are still holding on to it. The next step is to create positive alternatives to such negative beliefs such as no I am good enough and then see do these beliefs represent the authentic you.
Identifying Discrepancies
Identify the discrepancy between your actions and your beliefs. If you make a sexist, racist, or any other hurtful remark ask yourself is that what you really believe or is it just because someone else taught this to you. If you acknowledge what is actually true for you then you can live a life in which you can be authentic to yourself.
Letting go of beliefs and patterns that do not serve you
When you come across an emotion that you feel is just not you try letting it go. According to researches visualization is a good tool for it. Imagine the belief or emotion in a bubble and let it rise until it disappears. You can also write it on a paper and then cross it, crumble the paper and just throw it away.
Read more: 5 ways to stand up for yourself
We need to recognize the fact that developing authenticity takes time. The process of examining ourselves is a lifelong process as we are always evolving as human beings so it takes time to know the real you. It takes time to release the beliefs and behaviors that we believe no longer serve us but it does not mean that we can’t do it. With some effort, we can find ourselves aligned with our true selves.
Another important thing is to maintain our authenticity and we can do that by simply practicing some habits in our daily life such as the habit of speaking the truth, making decisions and statements consciously, and continuously monitoring ourselves. If you want to progress you need a growth mindset which helps you learn from past experiences and a willingness to strive to improve oneself. This may sound like a long journey but trust me it is worth it!
Read More:
15 things you don’t know about living in the moment
5 Ways to Stand Up for Yourself
My 6 tried and true steps to Forgive and free yourself from all the burden
